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datatime: 2022-10-08 04:08:36 Author:QCBtfaBd

11/25/63: Ate to oblivion.

Karyn learned she was pregnant. Mark and Marcia took her down to Tj. 7/9/6 3: Like a nightmare. This can't be happening to me. 7/10/63: Oh God--I don't know what to do. Called Dr. Estrada (call back after noon).

7/25/63: I'm so happy. How long can it last? 7/30/63: Andy with Anna. Me watched from hedge. Awful. Nightmares.

6/27/63: Getting my self-respect back. I'm stronger. 6/30/63: Oh Andy, lovely, lovely. 7/1/63: 134 pounds. Beginning today--I starve 124 pounds. Dr. Krohn, 1:30 p.M. (Figure's looking better.) Andy: 'It excites me to hurt U a little.

Really MAD at the Son of a Bitch. For the first time, I really dislike Andy. He shows no consideration or understanding & he humiliates me. 8/18/63: How dare he not make one concession or show any feelings?

It was all Andy now.

Karyn tanked auditions. Karyn shopped and ate and saw shrinks.

It was all Andy now.

11/1/63: No Andy--spyed on him. 11/2/63: Went to his house--selfish, independent, inconsiderate & thoughtless. Never gives & unpenetrable. 11/4/63: I hid in attic; then sat outside in cold for 2 or 3 hours. Wish I were dead. 1 1/8/63: Dr. Kroger-- cried in his office. 11/9/63: Eating all day & night. 11/10/63: Can't stand it--I'm losing reality. 11/11/63: Call Andy--sex. 11/15/63: 2:00 P.M.--Kroger. Happy & up. Wore pink skirt-- Admiring looks.

1/17/63: Met Andy for lunch. He was attentive. Wide Country--Andy was brilliant, I was an EXTRA. Felt depressed. 1/20/63: Andy--aloof. 2/5/63: Tense & anxious over Andy's attitude. 2/11/63: Me tense, blurred vision. To Dr. Getzoff (pills) with Andy. 2/19/63: Must maintain my own identity; not become his door-mat. So useless.

At his house; found out about Cheryl H. & B. Scott. Awful 'I don't want to see you tonight either.' I went over. Got in. Came back later--HYSTERICS.

Karyn tanked auditions. Karyn shopped and ate and saw shrinks.

Karyn stopped auditioning. Karyn cut down her social contacts. 8/15/63: I must not be possessivesweet.

3/25/63: Andy picked me up 5:3o. Lovely love--ate at DuPar's--Back & lovely love. 4/ 9/6 3: Eating much too much. 4/11/63: I love Andy Prine. 5/21/63: 12 P.M.--Dr. Kroger. Gave me weight capsules. Finally get a 'lift.' Appetite's inhibited. 5/30/63: Andy distant--me terribly possessive and weak.

Beside them:

A list of all the men she'd slept with.

The datebook ended five weeks short of New Year's. A sheet was clipped to the back.

11/25/63: Ate to oblivion.

At his house; found out about Cheryl H. & B. Scott. Awful 'I don't want to see you tonight either.' I went over. Got in. Came back later--HYSTERICS.

11/22/63: President assassinated.

Karyn stopped auditioning. Karyn cut down her social contacts. 8/15/63: I must not be possessivesweet.

7/25/63: I'm so happy. How long can it last? 7/30/63: Andy with Anna. Me watched from hedge. Awful. Nightmares.

The datebook ended five weeks short of New Year's. A sheet was clipped to the back.

Andy acting ugly. Complete indifference. Scene at his house. I'm hysterical.

11/22/63: President assassinated.

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